and it was worth it

Hoo boy. I screwed up. What started as a 12-hour break from vegan-ish-pescatarian-ism gradually turned into a 24-hour break…36 hours…48…an even three days. Fine. It was four.

But I had a great weekend. And, I reminded myself that I am now very careful about what I ingest so I can have such a weekend of pure debauchery. It all started at Katahdin–the restaurant, not the mountain

I met some friends there for cocktails on Friday night. Honestly, that Winnie serves it up right. I’m a sucker for a pretty woman calling me “lovely,” as in “Hello lovely! Would you like a Manhattan?”

Yes please.

After delightful conversation and a Manhattan with a sidecar of more Manhattan, we started to walk to Ruski’s to see Darien Brahms (check out Jekyll & Hyde. Perfect.) and Chicky Stoltz (listen to Girl Trouble. Brilliant.) with a side of Captain Noah Barnes of the Dolphin Strikers. Since Otto was on the way to the show, I made the executive decision to eat some cheese. It’s fine, I told myself. And, you know what? Even if it isn’t fine? It would be worth it.

Cut to Ruski’s, some delicious music, several glasses of bourbon, and I found myself wandering back to an apartment where Noah and Chicky were staying. Suddenly, I found an egg, bacon, and cheese sandwich on a bagel sitting in front  of me. Well, I didn’t want to be rude, right?

The next morning, I was awoken by the chitter chatter of my buddies who both have small children and are accustomed to getting up far earlier than those of us who live most the time alone and work from home.

A quick trip to Local for some breakfast where I ordered a mushroom, kale, egg scramble with a buttery english muffin and homefries, and two mimosas. The fellas ordered yogurt, fresh fruit, granola, and a salad.

Assholes.

And here’s where things started to get dicey. On my way back from Portland Saturday afternoon, I started to convince myself that a pile of french fries would make me feel so much better. With a cheeseburger. And a big coke. I kept trying to talk myself out of it but continued driving until I discovered I had pulled into Five Guys. I was sitting in the parking lot staring at the door. It was a busy Saturday afternoon and people were coming and going, pulling in and pulling out. I thought, who’s going to know? One greasy cheeseburger with a small french fry. Who’s it going to hurt?

Me. That’s who will know. That’s who it will hurt. I’m not living this vegan/fish lifestyle so I can impulse buy a cheeseburger from some chain restaurant when I’m hungover. Regardless of whether or not it’s a locally owned, operated establishment, I started to think about everything I had read about fat content and more fat content. Would it have been worth it? No.

I thought that might be the end of my meat and cheese fest, until I decided to meet another friend at…wait for it…Katahdin again Saturday night. This time around, I wasn’t even pretending. We shared a ricotta cheese squash pie, a warm crab pot filled with cheese and cream, and a salad for good measure. For dinner, I ordered the salmon, which had been fried in bacon fat. So. Good. And it was worth it.

By the time Sunday morning rolled around, I was feeling the effects of grease and fat and booze and…in the interest of full disclosure, the cigarettes. I came downstairs to discover a box from On Target Living containing two bags of flaxseed, two bottles of cod liver oil, a jar of coconut baking oil, and a bag of Chlorella & Spirulina tablets (in short, a bag of pond scum tablets). It was like waking up to an angry neighbor who has had enough of your late-night shenanigans or like waking up to a parent as a teenager after stumbling home at two in the morning. The judgment and disappointment coming off that box was soul crushing.

Did I mention Groom is now the head of HR at his company? Yeah, from this point forward, I believe I shall refer to him as Toby Flenderson. But, my Toby now has a bead on all this wellness information and health habit diet lifestyle live longer nonsense. I’m on board, and my poor broken down Sunday morning body was pretty eager to get back on track. Some oatmeal with dates, some water, a spoonful of cod liver oil, a bunch of pond scum tablets throughout the day. All good. And, yes, it was worth it.

In a nutshell:

  • Cod liver oil has Vitamin D, Omega-3 Fatty Acids, Vitamin E, and it’s not as bad as you think, but it totally gives you dog breath
  • Pond scum tablets aid digestion, support the immune system, and act as a detoxifier, and I think you know which one of those items interested me most on Sunday morning
  • Flaxseeds decrease inflammation and help lower cholesterol, and I have nothing snarky to say about that

I’m not in tune enough with my body to really notice any difference, but I will say already I can cross my legs with the back of my knee over the front of my opposing knee. I haven’t been flexible enough to do that in years. Years. So, whatever I’m doing? I’m going to keep doing it.

Groom…I mean Toby…and I went for a walk Sunday afternoon with dog down by Spirit Pond and I was feeling all smug about being back on track even though I had to cut the walk short because my neck was bothering me from looking down at the path (I was trying to avoid the tree stumps and roots but looking down is no bueno).

Otherwise, still good, still back on track. My brother sent me a picture of his lunch Sunday (bacon donuts) and I smugly sent back a picture of my lunch Sunday (hummus and tomatoes on soy pita with apple slices). I was back, baby.

For the most part, I was feeling better, getting my sanctimonious attitude back, until Toby reminded me we had dinner plans. So, I made the executive decision to stay mum with my hosts about any dietary restrictions and continue with my truce.

We had delightful conversation with some old friends. And bourbon and wine and chicken marbella and chocolate and cookies. And it was worth it.

I thought I was done with the meat and cheese weekend again until I got a text from a friend of mine yesterday afternoon while I was enjoying a nice snack of lentils and arugula. Would I be interested in having dinner at El Camino? I thought I might bail on it until she then mentioned it would include a trip to Drapeau’s Costumes of Maine in Lisbon. A costume shop Halloween week in the creepiest town in Maine. Like I’m going to say no to that.

She, of course, doesn’t celebrate Halloween but dresses up like a giant dalmation and wanders around Boothbay because she and her husband own the delightful Two Salty Dogs Pet Outfitters. If you’re in the area on Halloween, make sure you goose the black and white dog getting accosted by a bunch of children. She’ll love that. While you’re there, make sure you get all zombie around their dog Coal. He barks at zombies. Best dog ever.

But I digress (and I can’t find a clip of Hans Landa of Inglourious Basterds saying, “But, I digress,” so I’m giving you this instead). After picking up her costume, we ended up at Enoteca Athena (sister restaurant to the most awesome ever Trattoria Athena) because El Camino was closed. We shared (aka, chowed on) cauliflower fritters, vegetable dolmathes, artichokes and prosciutto (yeah, I fell hard) to start. Then she ordered fish tacos and I got some falafel.

My friend said the last bite was the absolute best bite of each dish and we realized we were eating so fast that the flavors weren’t even fully settling in. That’s how good it was. And that’s how disgusting I am.

And that last bite was definitely worth it.

Sarah Devlin

About Sarah Devlin

Sarah Devlin has been writing about the recreational industry since the late ’90s but ironically can’t run, swim, or bike a mile.